Let's Stick Together - How to Stay Spiritually Connected
We have found that there is a lot of struggle in couples to find a way to spiritually connect with each other. Often times there are these preconceived ideas of how to best approach each other to talk spiritual things.
The "Throw it out there before you chicken out"
HEY WHAT'S GOD DOING IN YOUR LIFE!?!?
The "Just power through and ask already"
Well....I thought....it was just a thought...maybe...we could talk about what God is teaching us?
The "I just want to know, so I don't care how this comes across"
You haven't said much about God recently, how are you guys doing?
None of these are your best option, if you were wondering.
For the longest times the extent of our own spiritual conversation was limited to "Did you like that service" "Yea, you?" "Yea." The End. And even if the conversation went longer than that it was mostly one of us getting offended that the other didn't like or did like something from the service that we had the opposite opinion of.
God intends for us to have much more conversation about Spiritual Things than most of us are having.
We want to help you have healthy, spiritual conversations in your relationships. And we have spent so much time finding the best tool for the job.
The Sticky Note.
Some History :
In the early years of our ministry we were often asked to include some form of session, or teaching, on the Love Languages. How you best give and receive love. The Five Love Languages is a great book and amazing resource if you have never spent time with it. After one of these Love-Language-Focussed sessions we were approached by a gentleman, we say this because he was easily our parents age, who picked up on our love languages (Dale - Physical Touch / Jena - Words of Affirmation) and had crafted, for lack of any better word, an idea to combine those. He began his pitch - remember, overconfidence is key - by jumping in between us and saying "I have solved your problem!". Not knowing that we had a problem that needed fixing we asked "what problem?". The response was "Your love language problem". Well...now our interest was fully peaked. The remainder of the pitch went something like this:
Gentleman - Jena, I think you should take some bright colored sticky notes, have Dale write affirming words on all of them, and stick them all over his naked body. And then you can be intimate and both of your love languages will be fulfilled.
To say the least, neither of us responded for a while before simply smiling and nodding.
All that to say, we are NOT advising that you partake in this gentleman's idea. But, we are going to share how to use the sticky note in a less awkward, possibly dangerous, way to connect spiritually with your spouse.
Spiritually Connecting in our relationships is very challenging. We want to help you find a way to do this well and consistently. To that end we came up with this idea of The Sticky Note Prayer Plan.
Here is how it works:
Take a sticky note.
Number it 1-2-3.
Write on the note 3 ways your spouse can pray for you that day
Exchange sticky notes
Commit to pray for those areas throughout the day
Come together in the evening and discuss how the three things unfolded today
From simply doing this little exercise we cultivate a prayer covering as well as create an arena for spiritual discussion in a non-threatening, stress free way. This automatically gives you a place of connection with each other and creates an entry place into spiritual conversation with each other.
We don't do this activity every day, or even every week/month. But, when we find ourselves feeling disconnected, this helps us get back into the flow of connection with one another.
So, we want to challenge you to take The Sticky-Note Challenge!
- Spend one week sharing with each other these sticky notes to keep spiritual connection going and see what God does.
- Take a picture of you and your spouse with sticky notes on your forehead and share it on social media with the hashtag #WeAreKeepingItReal and tag us in your post.
- Come back to this post on the Keeping it Real Community Page and share what you saw God do in your relationship and personal lives during this challenge.
We cannot wait to see what God does as each of us grow into having a sticky note marriage!